My girlfriend has recently brought it to my attention that I seem to be cheating on her with another woman. That other woman is my new iPhone that, ironically, my girlfriend gave me as a gift for christmas. I think she suspected that this might not be the best way for us to spend more time together, but never the less, also knew how much I was drooling over it in magazines, websites, and department store windows. She is a very unselfish person and so she bought me the very thing that she now insists has replaced her. That is true love.
“You don’t need me anymore now” she says with a sarcastic smile. “You’ve got everything you need in that stupid phone”.
“Not everything”, I said. “I can’t have sex with it.”
Don’t cream on the screen Robbie!